Pour One Out #1: Sauced
A weekly newsletter featuring Brooklyn bars to try on your way to where you're going. Written by your friend and fellow fan of nightcaps, Molly Wilcox.
“Drunkenness is nothing but voluntary madness.” ~ Seneca
Welcome to my completely objective and unqualified newsletter reviewing Brooklyn bars! I'm so happy you're here. To begin, it's important for you to know that I have too much time on my hands from the vexing fact that I don't have a full-time job. (Pour one out for the journalists!) And what do you do in New York in January while you're partly unemployed? Drink, obviously.
This is not a newsletter for dry-January inclined individuals. Instead, we're going to be wandering into some of Brooklyn's most iconic, fancy, divey, sleezy, sexy, overrated, underrated, and generally interesting bars with one overall question in mind: is it worth it? With thousands of bars to choose from in this borough alone, this is a weekly newsletter to help a friend out. (Or just an excuse for me to try new bars, you decide.) So, as my Australian boss said into the karaoke microphone before ripping a "Come on Eileen" rendition at our last staff party, Cheers cunts!
Up First: Sauced Wine Bar
📍Location: 331 Bedford Avenue, Williamsburg. It's positioned right in the middle of all-the-yuppies-and-their-puppies Williamsburg, but somehow this place feels ~cooler~ than the flannel-wearing 35 year old couple who own a walk-up around the corner and a golden doodle that they refer to as their child.
💫 Vibe: You will undoubtably find gold chains, bucket hats and mom jeans at Sauced, especially on a weekend. It's a dimly-lit, downstairs, cozy den lined with white subway tiles and rustic, wood beams. It has a back patio filled with swings, plants, pillows, and cozy corners to make out in. Some inside tables are filled with youngins dripped in Y2K, others are 45 year old couples with cool, somehow Frenchy vibes, but mostly it’s just your average t-shirt wearing 30 year old with an ironic porn-stache or non-ironic shullet.
🍸 Taste: They serve well-curated, natural wine from all over the world, but primarily from France. Red, white, rose, orange, and bubbles — they don't discriminate. They also serve sake and daily specials of tasty, tasty bites. Like really good.
💸 Price: A range of $ to $$$$ 🥵.
🚽 Bathroom: Clean, simple, not sticky — you love to see it! The walls are black with handwritten chalk graffiti so feel free to plaster your DIY missed connections. It has the atmosphere of a dive bar bathroom but the sanitation rating of a high-end restaurant … success!
💿 Music for your journey: Their vibe is "you've never heard of this song because we're cooler than you," and they're right. They spin records from open to close, typically in the hip-hop genre or something with a beat, and songs like Hip-Hop by Dead Prez, Spicy by Nas, and It's All About the Benjamins by Puff Daddy should get you in the right mindset on your journey over.
💭 Final Thoughts: Perfect for date night (except probably not a first date unless you want to ball out) or getting sauced with friends literally any night of the week.
That's all for now folks. If you go to Sauced and like it, tell me more and send me selfies. If you hate it, forgive me and tell me why. Catch you next week my ~S A U C Y~ friends! ;)
[Pitch a bar I should review and give me feedback here & follow my poorly executed Instagram here.]